Stories shape our reality! What myths did you grow up with around race? Class? Were you taught you could "pull yourself up by your bootstraps," for example? Did someone teach you that feelings are a sign of weakness? What were your taught about gender and what it means to be a "real man," for example? What stories are you hearing in the media about immigrants? People from the global majority? Christians?
Short-form videos give you an opportunity to tell a different story! The video below tells a story that is intended to be compassionate toward cisgender men. It simultaneously critiques the stories about "being a real man" that justify and perpetuate violent behavior. This video also subtly undermines hierarchy by having a congregant educate a pastor. It is meant to encourage further discussion.
TRANSCRIPT
Karen: Can we talk about how most mass shooters are men?
Pastor Sarah: And?
Karen: Well, if that's true, it's not just the guns that are the problem. Women and non-binary folks have access to semi-automatic weapons and they almost never commit mass shootings.
Pastor Sarah: I mean, I still think access to guns is an issue, but go on.
Karen: Well, what is it about men that causes them to do this?
Pastor Sarah: No idea.
Karen: It's not just testosterone, because you don't have trans men or women getting testosterone therapy committing mass shootings. It's just cis men. So I did some research and I found this great piece from WAMU.
Pastor Sarah: You’re listening to public radio now?
Karen: Yes.
Pastor Sarah: Okay.
Karen: It connects mass shootings to something called “male grievance culture” in America. It basically says men feel like they're entitled to a certain level of respect. Like there's this myth that if you're a “real man,” you have power and you get what you want.
Pastor Sarah: Is the theory then that women and non-binary folks just pick up early on that the “American Dream” is a lie, and so we have no expectation of power or respect?
Karen: I mean, it's kind of sad, but yeah. Cis men buy into this idea that they deserve money, sex, etc. So when these guys are denied by women, or at work, or whatever, they feel powerless and unmanly, and then they lash out as a way of regaining power.
Pastor Sarah: And we've somehow socialized men to think that responding with violence is a way to get their man card back?
Karen: I think so.
Church of the Good Shepherd, UCC | Albuquerque, NM
Pacific School of Religion | Berkeley, CA
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